The assignment from TPTB at Book Boyfriends Cafe this Friday is to give you, faithful readers, a scene in which our heroine has become hot and bothered by the hero's seductive blandishments.
The following describes one of my first submissive sexual experiences:
We explored the dungeon and the equipment. The play space was clean and nicely decorated, with the usual emphasis on chains and black leather. There were Saint Andrew’s crosses, racks and slings, all of which intrigued me. The old-fashioned dentist’s chair startled me. I’ve been with a dentist, and little about him had been sexy.
Upstairs was a huge, romantically draped bed with sturdy-looking bedposts. A few feet away was a contraption that looked as though it had been designed with bondage and discipline in mind. It had a horizontal ring to hold the face and head attached to a surface, perhaps three feet long, for one’s torso to rest upon. Arm and leg supports, and every inch of it was padded. Every part of it had rings for the attachment of ropes or chains.
I looked at him and then this…bondage device…and then back at him. He smiled.
I said, “I want you to know that when we do this, I’m going to develop some deep feelings for you. I’m falling for you.” I know myself fairly well, and am aware that for me, sex and intimacy are intertwined. I wish I didn’t feel that way, but I tend to become emotionally involved with the men I’m fucking. The weekend had already been very intimate, and deeper intimacy was coming. I asked Trapper, “Can you deal with that?”
I needed to know that I would be taken care of. Not just my body but my mind and heart as well.
He told me, “Yes, there will be a role for you.”
A niggle of doubt itched me briefly, but at the time, that was enough for me to hear. I was eager to advance into this new experience, one I had craved for so long.
He directed me to remove some of my outerwear before hooding and gagging me. Then he guided me to the whatever-it-was and eased me onto it face down. He secured wrist and ankle restraints around me, then tied them to it. Lifting my skirt, he cut off my black lace panties.
I told myself never to wear panties around Trapper again. What for?
So I was bound to immobility and completely available. I was gagged, which meant that I could maybe grunt out my “safe word” if necessary. Or not.
Again, I don’t recall exactly what happened.
I remember being spanked, flogged and thoroughly fucked. I remember being smacked repeatedly with something—I didn’t know what, but I suspected it was made of leather—that hurt like a motherfucker. I recall begging him, “Please, sir, please sir, please sir…” through the gag.
I remember coming a lot.
I remember Trapper bending over me, covering me with his body and heat, hissing into my ear, “Whose are you?”
To which I promptly responded, “I’m yours.”
And I meant it.
The excerpt is from Perilous Play: The Real Fifty Shades. Very little in this fictionalized memoir is untrue. The above scene definitely happened.
Here's what the book is about:
One woman’s journey into the contemporary kink underworld, Perilous Play is Suz deMello’s explosive personal account of her experiences with BDSM. Engaging and honest, this groundbreaking memoir will grab you and never let you go.
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